Coming Clean

Hey y’all…have fun!It’s the weekend! Sorta slow day around here actually, compared to the rest of the week…got out of the house for a change and ran a few errands like I was on a waterslide to get nice and press my luck a little. But let’s get serious for a moment.

For those who haven’t figured it out yet, or felt like not giving a fuck about my passive/aggressive alluding, I’m in the process of getting a poetry collection published. So yeah, #itshappening and all that. I’m nervous, excited, stressed, panicky, and hellbent on this being fucking sweet…even if the material isn’t quite as up to par as I remembered it to be (even though it won a Writing.com Quill Award for Best Poetry Collection in 2016). I’ve got a second manuscript in the works as well, which upon reflection while getting into this process is buttloads better. So yeah homies…buy this first one and it’ll help finance the breakout sequel. Ain’t nothin’ but a party y’all…let’s get it on!

I’m hooked up with Eliezer Tristan Publishing and as soon as we get the cover settled and the results of my photo shoot in, we’ll have a mawfuggin’ book ready. Still tinkering with the actual website with the hope that you can buy it from there, get it on your Kindle from Amazon, or maybe show up at one of the functions I’m hoping will fall into place once I’ve got a book in my hand to sign and sell. Eliezer Tristan wants to put me out soon, and feature me on their website as well, which is sick and I’m eternally grateful for that opportunity.

I’m going to be a published author.

Just typing those words is surreal. An indie press wants to put me out, and they want my poetry. Years of battered self-confidence have led me to believe this can’t be happening, or accept that I’m good enough for this. I’m scared that it all might go away and leave me wondering how I fucked something up again. But I acknowledge that yes, this is real, and I need to start believing in it a hell of a lot more while I’m working at doing my part.

And make no mistake…I’m not harboring delusions of being some sort of “overnight success” where I’m suddenly famous in the large poetry world. I have meager goals, realistic expectations, and an honest mentality. I’m doing what I love and I now can expose it to a wider audience than I could with WDC (which I still love and support and you should too). And I get to do it with a company that’s artist-first and takes full interest in my thoughts and wishes for this book (at least I hope they still do…working on the cover has been a bit distressing but we can work through that). I was starting to consider self-pub days before I got the call from Sarah Fader that literally changed my damn life.

“We’re going to make this happen.”

Like, how do you even respond to that when you’re on the phone?? I hate talking on the phone as it is, so dammit…I had no one around to hi-5 or hug or just be like “Hey man, that’s awesome!”. And I suck sometimes at spontaneous conversation. Like, really suck. My phone specialty is a 30-second “I’m on my way” or “I’m here” or the automated calls from doctors’ offices reminding me of various appointments. When “Thank you!!” is all you can muster, how do you really feel, and how do you convey that over the phone? I get lost easily in that respect.

So anyway, let’s recap…I’m being published!!! Let’s get it out there for the world to see, so I can stop being shady and pretend-sneaky about it. There’s my info, there’s my things, and there’s my feelings. Let’s go full-blast into the weekend with a sunny June Saturday afternoon playlist supplied of course from my iTunes library, my friends…

• The Get Up Kids, “Coming Clean”
• Rick Derringer, “Rock & Roll Hoochie Koo”
• Johnny Cash, “Cool Water”
• Incubus, “The Warmth”
• Anthrax, “Among The Living”
• Helmet feat. David Yow, “Custard Pie”
• Nirvana, “Big Long Now”
• Moby, “Find My Baby”
• Marvin Gaye, “Come Get To This”
• OK Go, “What To Do” …mediocre people do exceptional things all the time!

Alright, that’s all I got for you cats today. I got other stuff to catch up on and do and make prettier than they are. Peace y’all…motherfuckin’ yeah, gonna be published bitches!